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Project 52 | THIRTEEN

Metadata: iPhone 4, processed in Instagram w/ Inkwell


Up every half hour. Up every hour. For how many weeks straight now?

One sleeps, the other wakes up. They flip flop. They wake each other up.

Nursing 10 times a day.

This week I was that mom.

That mom who let her kid play on the iPad too much. That mom who napped while her kid watched Cars, with the other babe sleeping in my arms. That mom who let her kid have her iPhone the entire time she was at Target.

That mom who I said I’d never be.

Well, hello, survival mode.

& not a single picture on my big camera. This will have to do.

I’m only human.



& Project 52 is off to a very collaborative start! If you’d like to join in–it’s not too late. Here’s everything you need to know about

my 2012 Project 52.

& those of you who are linking up (please let me know if you need to be edited/added!):

Adventures in MommyhoodAubrey My LoveBlossoms & VintageBugs & Boo-Boos Candice Craves Caynay PhotographyChristina’s Project 52 Chronicles of KT The Crain’s Nest Dana Moran Photography The Daulton Dabbler Englexas Everything Eatherton Fairy Wings & Dinosaurs Finding Joy Firecracker MamaFreckled PinkFrom Stanwood to Seoul Gin & Juice Boxes Heather Marie PortraitsIci & LaIt’s a Graham LifeIt’s a Strange & Lovely RideKate L Photography Keeping up with the Carters Kim Percival PhotographyLiving for Love Lizzi Photography Mahina & Lucas Mama Bethany McLain Padilla Photography Mist Moments Memories by Mere Moments & Impressions The Mommyhood Memos Moo with Me Moxie Made My Tot TravelsNavigating the MothershipNicole Dina PhotographyOh the Places We’ll GoOur Baby Behr Our Splendid Little Life Phreckle Face Photography Quiet FootstepsRachel Gray PhotographyThe Robersons Shades of Bliss Shutter Mama BlogSide of the TableSimply Us Snaps of Our LifeSquamish Baby The Todd’s We Aren’t Scared of SugarWe’re Better Together Wicked KateWokabout Z as in Zebra

Related Posts with Thumbnails
  • donya - I’ve got to be honest, it’s good to hear others struggle with the infant stage as well. No one really told me how tough it could be and I felt like a failure those first couple months. And that was only with one! I’ll be in the same spot as you this Fall and I’m scared! But, the stage will pass someday. For both of us.
    Good luck Shawna!ReplyCancel

    • carrie g - oh i am familiar with that mom! 2 is a whole new game! as my oldest sister said, remember that this is just a blip in caroline’s life. a couple of months is not going to change the amazing person she is. (and belle is becoming sooo independent – sad sometimes bc of course she will always be my baby, but very good for her) besides what could be better than the reward of a baby brother? PS glad to hear i’m not alone!ReplyCancel

  • adriel @ the mommyhood memos - oh bless your little heart! we’ve all been “that mom” at one point or another!! just last week i wrote a post called “i was totally ‘that’ mom”. see? there you go! ;) i hope things will take a turn for you though. survival mode is only bearable for so long. *sigh* and also i hope you have some good support around you for this short but intense season!! we can’t do it alone. that, i’m absolutely sure of.ReplyCancel

  • Navigating the Mothership - Hi Shawna. Just wanted to say that I can very much relate to the “just survive” feeling. My husband went on a business trip to Paris when my son was 7 weeks old and my daughter was 2.5 years and I had a similar VERY hard week. Plus there were all those hard weeks around that one. Sleep deprivation is one of the cruelest things – it just makes you feel ill and so hopeless (at least that’s what it does to me!) I’m hoping things ease up for you soon. Hang in there. You have laid all the groundwork so some weeks of parenting at a less than stellar level will not matter in the big picture.ReplyCancel

  • laura - don’t worry- we all have to be “that mom” sometimes. the second child really brings it out in us- i have given up on some of the things that i was so strict about with my first, cause sometimes, you just gotta let it go. this stage goes so fast- my babies turn 4 and 2 next month, and i don’t know where that time has gone. get in all your cuddles, kisses and zzz’s and don’t worry about being “that mom”, cause you’re their mom, and they adore you!ReplyCancel

  • kaley - I think I was that mom with only one baby, I can’t even imagine having two! :) Hang in there!ReplyCancel

  • Angela at OneSmileyMonkey - I can totally relate to that “survival” feeling as my little boy was very very high maintenance during the infant stage. My girl friends where telling their little ones were sleeping lots and they had to wake them up to nurse (hello he was nursing non stop every half an hour – hour for weeks). The good thing is that it gets better, a lot better and it is all worth it! You will get your sleep I promise!
    Hang in there mama!ReplyCancel

  • Carrie - That sounds exhausting! Just reading your FB and instagram posts makes me tired thinking about getting through those days! Don’t be too hard on yourself about the camera – at least you’re documenting the little things in some form :) This too shall pass…ReplyCancel

  • Natalie - Hang in there! You are doing a fantastic job. You’re not “that” Mom – because, well, just look at this beautiful site. Your fun instagram. Your adorable projects. No, no, you just couldn’t be “that” Mom. This is a transition, and you’re amazing!ReplyCancel

  • Julie Meier - Shawna!

    You have always been THAT mom!
    THAT mom – loves her babies
    THAT mom – know what is important
    THAT mom – knows when to let things go, and focus on the important things
    THAT mom – knows all about GRACE and FLEXIBILITY
    THAT mom – is teaching her children what is really important in life.

    This phase will pass! Hang in there!

    Much LOVE!!ReplyCancel

  • Ali - AMEN sister!!ReplyCancel

  • Erin - I agree that it is sometimes good to hear of others struggles with this stage! I’m just a few weeks behind you – my 2nd was born on 3/4 and my first is 26 months old. Thankfully (seriously, don’t know how I’d handle it if this wasn’t true) my first is still going to daycare, but I still feel very “survival mode” right now, even with “just one” during the day.ReplyCancel

  • Annemarie - The only reason there is a “that mom” in the first place is due to judgement from others…or ourselves. You’re a Mom. A great Mom. “That” is fantastic. Looks like to me that you’re enjoying it and that is what really matters. :)ReplyCancel

  • April - Hang in there! This too shall pass….and one piece of advice(because I’m THAT MOM too)…If anyone is offering to help…even for just a couple of hours..take them up on it! I’ve been following your blog for awhile now and I know your immediate family is not there. So, if someone offers, don’t hesitate girl! AND…I promise I’m not crazy..but I would love to help. I’m just up the road in Round Rock and my mom (and most of my family) live in SA, and I would be HAPPY to help. Even for a couple of hours (this probably does seem weird since I’m posting it–but I’m serious). I’m a stay-at-home mom too and our oldest ones can play, while you sleep. No joke-If I’m ever coming your way–I’m going to send you an email. OR you can email Have a great weekend! Really…ReplyCancel

  • Allison - Hi Shawna!

    You have such a beautiful little family. Such a blessing! Mahina Sayin from We we’re sayin blog told me about how she follows your Project 52. I would love to join you and the others. Please send me any details on how to get started. I’m a new follower now. Looking forward to following your posts. Thanks a bunch!

    Come visit me at


  • Bee - Thank you for having this post! I have a 1 month son and a 19 month old daughter and am feeling near a nervous breakdown all the time!ReplyCancel

  • Mahina - It’s okay to be “that” mom every so often because you are raising two beautiful children! It will only get easier…ReplyCancel

  • Crystal - The transition to two is the hardest! I have three and have found myself doing the same thing sometimes…doing things I never thought I would do until I hit survival mode…um which sometimes can happen quite often in a house with three little ones! but, survival mode doesn’t have to last forever! Plus, there’s still a difference. We can have discernment to know that maybe some things are okay in survival mode, but not all the time…not to form bad habits. So what if a video has to be a babysitter here and there in insane times….we just make sure it’s a good one and don’t let it happen enough to form bad habits. You seem to be a great intentional mom, hang in there! Sure you know this, but enjoy the moments….even the crazy ones….these are the moments we grow from. Praying for God to be your Sustainer. :)ReplyCancel

  • Nessa - I see myself being that mom to – a few months away from adding #2 and a 2 year old. I already have been that mom a few times in chunks already. Survival is key. Love this photo.ReplyCancel

  • Megan - I know… Been there, done that. But don’t call yourself just “that Mom”. ‘Cause you are amazing and doing a fantastic job!ReplyCancel

  • Shirley Fai - Being a mom is never easy and we are all aware with it…I salute all moms! I really like the photo you have shared here…The effects are just perfect!ReplyCancel

  • Laur - Honesty, so refreshing. Your doing great.ReplyCancel

  • Jessica Sliman - Ohh…it’s amazing how easy it is to judge until you’ve been in someone’s shoes? I know I’ve been guilty in the past – but I had too many days where I was “that” mom. Once having Grace. And especially once having Neva. I hope survival mode ends soon…God knows that a little sleep – in longer increments – does everyone some good :)ReplyCancel

  • Karisa Tomkinson - So I just came across your blog and feel like I just found a soul-sister… ha ha! It seems we have quite a LOT in common. Once being that I’m in a very similar spot as you with my two little ones (oldest is a girl and will be 2 in a week and my youngest is just over 3 months). It’s amazing how life can be so completely different from just one child to two kiddos. I wouldn’t trade it for the world, but some days I’m glad I make it to bed-time. Thank heavens I’ve been able to get my kiddos to nap at the same time (most days) and to sleep through the night (the little one is up about 2-3 times to nurse still though). Please email me though to vent, chat, or just whatever… Good luck and hope you get some more sleep soon. :)ReplyCancel

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