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It’s never too late?

I have wrestled with what this post should say for several months now. I am not sure this is all going to come out exactly right, but it’s coming out nonetheless. That’s what blogs are for, after all. Getting to know the person behind the business. Not just the business in front of the person.

Just over one year ago, my life was very different. I wrote this post, which summed up the start of my business. I have always been a quote person, and one in particular just spoke to me: “It’s never too late to be what you might have been” by George Eliot. This quote was motivating. It helped me believe in this vision I had for my business, which is a big one. I know what this business has the potential to be.

However, after many months, some soul searching and some significant reevaluation of my priorities I am here at this conclusion: now is not the time.

Today, I sit here with a completely different perspective. I think George Eliot is more of a dreamer than I am. This quote is no longer a source of inspiration & I even think she may be wrong. If I don’t take these precious years with my young family & give them all I’ve got, then someday it will be too late to be what I might have been. To be the mother & wife I want to be, I do not have the time for a full-fledged business. I am not interested in being mediocre, and parenting/home-keeping is no exception.

I love Love LOVE photography. I will do it for the rest of my life. Someday, when I have a few less domestic responsibilities it will be the beautiful, bustling business I know it can be. However, for right now, my time needs to be spent with, and enriching, my family. And taking pictures of them. Lots, and lots of pictures. (I mean how could you NOT…look at her!!)

That being said, I am not closing shop completely. I am simply allowing myself the freedom to work when it feels right. I have goals for this quieter time in my business life. I simply want to let each of you, who are kind enough to care about my business, know that I am still here. Limiting my work will guarantee you that when we DO work together, I can give you 100% of me. This is best for all of us. Promise. :D

So that being said, I am bringing ME back to this blog. It started as an outlet for my creative projects before there was any business to support. I feel like it has shifted towards a place of boredom for me, so I am going to start bringing back other topics beyond photography that I love & am passionate about. So hopefully you will come back for more. More creativity, more inspiration. And let me know you were here! Is there anyone still out there after my long absence?

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  • Kristen - I can relate to this post very much.
    …when we have more children [we have one now] I wonder what will become of my photog business as of now I struggle with the balance and wanting to ALWAYS be in two places at once.
    BIG (((hugs))) to you. Your children will certainly be blessed to have more mommy time. …and you having more YOU time.
    [here’s 2photogs that choose to do the same thing… thought you might like to read theirs too!]
    i’ll still stop in to see what you’ve been up to and admire your photography!!ReplyCancel

  • Kim - Very well written & very honest. You will be successful no matter what or when you decide to be. Doing this on you terms allows you to be a more complete you! Looking forward to the changes.ReplyCancel

  • annie - i’m still here! :) love reading your blog. you are a wonderful mother and wife and such a sweet person… your creativity is just an added bonus.ReplyCancel

  • Meghan - Well said! You’re SO right, you can’t go back and get this time again, and a well laid family foundation pays dividens far beyond what a business can offer. Thanks for the reminder that every mom needs once in a while – as hard as our jobs can be it’s nice to be reminded what it’s all about from someone who’s there too (and NOT the old lady in the commissary line, no matter HOW much experience she might have).ReplyCancel

  • Erinn - I too admire your honesty and your desire to focus more on your family. You are such a talented person, but yet none of that matters if you miss the most important years.ReplyCancel

  • Renee Booe - Loved reading this. This is honorable and I admire your heart. Girl, taking care of your family is and should be #1. So many women miss that. Caroline is blessed to have you. Know that you are very talented and I am sure whatever you post on her will be a joy for people to read.ReplyCancel

  • Nancy Eddinger - Shawna, I’m happy to tell you that George Eliot was a woman.ReplyCancel

  • Jana Perenchio - I pray you find the right balance for you & your precious family, Shawna. I know there’s no way I could’ve run a busy home business when I was in the process of having babies & raising my children along with being a military wife with no family around to help. I did small home businesses along the way but nothing as stressful & time-consuming as a photography biz can be and you’re a people-pleaser like me, we don’t do anything half-way, which puts even more stress on us. Know I’m here if you need to talk, I know that ONE of these days we’ll finally be able to get together!!ReplyCancel

  • Tori - I think George Elliot was right in what she said if a different interpretation is taken….it is never too late. It will not be too late to “start” putting all of your energy into this business – even if that “start” is 20 years from now! It’s never too late! It will never be too late! We have decades and decades left to live our lives and become what we might have been. We have decades to have multiple “careers” and “journies” to discover who we are and who we were meant to be.

    It is honorable that you are following your heart and being true to yourself in this moment of what is most important to you. You have chosen your family and home over a more visible career that often gives more public recognition than the career at home. You have chosen…for now….something much greater in reality yet so much smaller in fame and recognition at the moment. You are doing the very best at the hardest and most important job on earth, being a mother (and wife). You have chosen the harder road.

    Someday, on your deathbed (sorry to be morbid), you will look back at life and you will be able to see all you’ve done in your life. And, I guarantee you that even though there will be a list of accomplishments and achievements (photography being one) you have to be proud of, the things you will be thinking of and most proud of in that moment are how successful you were at loving and raising your children and loving and caring for your husband. You will probably see the accomplishments and achivements of your children at that moment over your own, since that is what life is truly about.

    I am proud of you and all that you are. I am blessed to call you my friend. And, I really should take a lesson from your book and be more authentic to what is truly important to me in this moment.

    I can’t wait to see all that you will become! It’s hard to imagine anything greater than the amazing person you already are! :)ReplyCancel

  • -shawna- - all of your support means so much to me. :) Thanks for cheering me on. ::smooch::ReplyCancel

  • Karen - Shawna, I’m so glad you’re back. I haven’t read your blog in awhile as you had taken a hiatus, but I’m so glad to see all of the beautiful pictures of your sweet blessing. Thank you for sharing.ReplyCancel

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