barriers. & overcoming.

To say I am a perfectionist is to put it mildly. I am often paralyzed by barriers in my head. Barriers that are actually really easy to overcome, but my brain just takes a little while to process the “how” in overwhelming situations. I take on too much. I sleep too little. I think too much. Sometimes I wish I could let go. & motherhood has been good for helping me do this, but from time to time & still get paralyzed. & that is no good.

I have always said that I am a big fan of therapy. I haven’t been in a few years, but it has provided me with some amazing tools for my “bag of tricks.” I often consult the little nuggets that I tucked from my weekly sessions in the past & I am forever grateful for the two women who helped me to mentally overcome some major barriers to my own success. This week I was reminded of a couple of those tricks.

I have been sitting here completely unable to move forward in my home. I need to make room for another person but I just couldn’t take a step forward. There was too much. It was too expensive. I could hear my husband saying “not all at once” in my head. But baby steps are hard for me. I like it done & I like it done NOW. I just couldn’t put all the pieces together. I have to have a plan before this baby comes and I have to be very well on my way to completion of I might lose it. I was spinning this week. Everything was in disarray.

But I went upstairs and just dug in. Bags & bags to goodwill. Cards from my wedding in the recycle bin. Letting go of things I really just don’t need. It was all a part of the cleansing process. Adele was helping me process my thoughts. Caffeine (only half caf, ok, relax) was helping me keep my energy up. And as soon as I had the TRASH, DONATE, KEEP items sorted, my lightbulb finally went off.

I needed to find an armoire.

I know it sounds ridiculous, but you have no idea the inner harmony that I suddenly felt once I reached this conclusion. It’s as if the clouds broke. I could see everything clearly. I knew where all the pieces were going to go. I just needed to get going. Do it. Even without a plan. I just had to GO.

Karen, a professional organizer, gave some spectacular advice at one of my MOPS meetings last year when she spoke about keeping an organized home. She advised NOT to shop for any organizational tools until we knew exactly what needed to organize. Well, duh. Why didn’t I think of that? Rubbermaid & baskets AFTER, shawna. Not before. That’s hard for me, you know. But as I was cleaning out my guestroom-soon-to-be-be-nursery closet, I realized that some of this stuff DID need to stay. & now I know exactly how much. Why not just find a big armoire, which will house some of this stuff & my computer peripherals, eliminating two pieces of furniture in the office-soon-to-be-office-AND-guestroom. And now I can breathe.

I thought about going antiquing, but I started on craigslist instead. Wastes less gas. I knew I wanted something BIG that I could refinish. I wanted lots of enclosed storage. I was looking for certain lines. & really wanted to spend no more than $100. Fat chance, right? I thought so. But then I found it. My answer.

It was delivered on Saturday (well worth the extra bit of cash he asked for to bring it to my home) and now I just need to refinish it. (white? distressed muted turquoise–like this? still deciding) but I have a huge weight lifted off my shoulders. All for $100. Who knew. & then…I sold the furniture that used to be in the guestroom…and broke even. Score one for shawna. ;)

I share because I am guessing if you read this blog, we might have a few things in common. Perfectionism might be one of them. And it still gets me sometimes. It’s easy to look at everything on this happy little corner of the internet & think that it’s easy for me to come up with, but it sure isn’t always that way. I struggle. I hit ruts. I stop all together. But the difference between failure and success is the ability to press on. & that…well, that is up to us. Time to get movin’.

Hi! Hello! I am Shawna, the founder of Styleberry Blog. This creative corner of the internet has become a learning haven for moms and creatives, offering a warm and encouraging nudge to those who wish to be better and do better, but often don't know where to start. From Decorating to DIY to Diapers and Paleo-ish Dishes, I strive to make the complicated simple and empower women to take action beyond their personal comfort zone. I subscribe to the Shine Theory & so strongly believe that we shine when the women around us shine and mutual support—lifting up instead of tearing down--will always be the culture here. Are you in? I hope so! Beyond the computer, I run Styleberry Creative where I work with clients to create low fuss, high function spaces that are pretty and practical in San Antonio, Texas and beyond. I LOVE making a house a home. My own studs out renovation is now complete and I am now back to working with clients. Please don't hesitate to drop me a line if you'd like to work together! I hope you’ll join me on this fun new adventure! Xo.